The lights go out all around me
One last candle to keep out the night
And then the darkness surrounds me
I know I'm alive but I feel like I've died
And all that's left is to accept that it's over
My dreams ran like sand through the fists that I made
I try to keep warm but I just grow colder
I feel like I'm slipping away
After all this has passed, I still will remain
After I've cried my last, there'll be beauty from pain
Though it won't be today, someday I'll hope again
And there'll be beauty from pain
You will bring beauty from my pain
My whole world is the pain inside me
The best I can do is just get through the day
When life before is only a memory
I'll wonder why God lets me walk through this place
And though I can't understand why this happened
I know that I will when I look back someday
And see how you've brought beauty from ashes
And made me as gold purified through these flames
After all this has passed, I still will remain
After I've cried my last, there'll be beauty from pain
Though it won't be today, someday I'll hope again
And there'll be beauty from pain
You will bring beauty from my pain
Here I am at the end of me
Tryin' to hold to what I can't see
I forgot how to hope
This night's been so long
I cling to Your promise
There will be a dawn
After all this has passed, I still will remain
After I've cried my last, there'll be beauty from pain
Though it won't be today, someday I'll hope again
And there'll be beauty from pain
You will bring beauty from my pain
One last candle to keep out the night
And then the darkness surrounds me
I know I'm alive but I feel like I've died
And all that's left is to accept that it's over
My dreams ran like sand through the fists that I made
I try to keep warm but I just grow colder
I feel like I'm slipping away
After all this has passed, I still will remain
After I've cried my last, there'll be beauty from pain
Though it won't be today, someday I'll hope again
And there'll be beauty from pain
You will bring beauty from my pain
My whole world is the pain inside me
The best I can do is just get through the day
When life before is only a memory
I'll wonder why God lets me walk through this place
And though I can't understand why this happened
I know that I will when I look back someday
And see how you've brought beauty from ashes
And made me as gold purified through these flames
After all this has passed, I still will remain
After I've cried my last, there'll be beauty from pain
Though it won't be today, someday I'll hope again
And there'll be beauty from pain
You will bring beauty from my pain
Here I am at the end of me
Tryin' to hold to what I can't see
I forgot how to hope
This night's been so long
I cling to Your promise
There will be a dawn
After all this has passed, I still will remain
After I've cried my last, there'll be beauty from pain
Though it won't be today, someday I'll hope again
And there'll be beauty from pain
You will bring beauty from my pain
Shortly after we lost baby Micah these lyrics were going through my head. Actually, they were going through James' head as well. We have had some other difficulties this past year as well. Things are turning out different that we had imagined. As I was driving home tonight, I heard this song and the lyrics rang true again. "And though I can't understand why this happened, I know that I will when I look back some day and see how you've brought beauty from ashes, and made me as gold purified through these flames." This is such a comfort. All that is lost is not forgotten. All that is broken is not thrown away. We are healing and moving forward. Some days are just harder than others.
I'm glad that you've been binding comfort in your pain. Sometimes I think about those people who don't have a solid reassurance of life after death and my heart breaks for them. The only reason I feel I can go on when loved ones pass is because I know that I will see them again. Without that, it must be wrenching. We still pray for you.
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